Snacks and I just had a for real conversation about how I would kick a person into space - maybe the sun - for my friends. Specifically my women friends. No matter how well I know them.

Talkin’ shit about bocchan? Roundhouse kicked into the sun.

Got a problem with strangestquiet? Stomp you into paste.

Jostle leeshmae in the grocery store? I will sass you up nasty. 

Gettin’ in the-eh-team's face? I don't even know her IRL last name and I'm feedin' your areolae to a crocodile. 

I’ve met weregarurumon like all of two times but based off of Bocchan’s affection for her if you so much as mess up her hair I will chew you in half like a beaver.

And these are my NEW friends. If you’re trying to come for masseffected or bitter-plum so help me I will punch you into a thousand pieces, then I will sew those pieces together into a set of matching suitcases, and then I will fill you with questionable items and hand you over to the TSA. 

I want to wrap you all up in cozy blankets and watch Disney movies in a pillow fort with hot cocoa and we can all nap in sunbeams with a family of kittens.